Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Walk Into the Light

He did it!I am so glad to be back home to my own dirty mess. It's funny to me how someone else's muck is gross, yet your own is so comforting.

Anyway, something really weird happened to me this morning. I woke up with a strange cassette tape in the pocket of an ultra comfortable dress that I slept in last night. I don't know if it was there all night or what, but I do know that everybody I know, including myself, swears they didn't put it there. And honestly, I don't know how the hell anybody would have been able to sneak it into my pocket without me noticing.

So, I listened to it when I got home this afternoon, and heard a rather funny man speaking to a crowd at an AA conference in 1978. It was pretty interesting so I listened to one whole side of it. Now I'm not sure which of the following two things I learned today.

A ghost at my aunts house thinks I'm an alcoholic.

Or

I'm a sleepwalking, amnesiac, kleptomaniac.

I used to wish I had some kind of drug problem so that maybe I could find a name and a support group for what's wrong with me, but nothing I ever read about seemed to fit. I've even been to a few AA meetings with friends, and I remember feeling a little left out and envious that I didn't fit in. I'm pretty sure I'm not an alcoholic, and I'm pretty sure that's not denial speaking. I do drink alcohol, yes. And sometimes way too much of it. I'm certainly retarded, but I don't think it has anything to do with whisky. Most of the time. Anyway, I'll pay more attention and see if I can find a reason to call myself an alcoholic.
I also don't think I've ever walked around in my sleep. At night anyway. Sure, I've worked full days at the office while sleeping, but nobody in my house has ever mentioned that I get up and do shit at night. And as far as I know, I have a memory so good it's creepy. I may have blacked out a few things, but done so pretty much on purpose, as far as I recall anyway. I also don't have random things lying around my house that I can't place where they came from.

So that only leaves one possibility-

I was so drunk last night that I don't remember stealing the tape.

7 comments:

madmax said...

That's not weird... THIS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2HZzi67hkVo is weird.

> <

Denise said...

Umm, that is a little freaky. I'll try and call you tonight. Wonder who the phantom commentor is?

Denise said...

And how did you know it was 1978?

Mommie Dearest said...

I promise it wasn't me.. can't say that it wasn't your dad's spirit..and what do you mean "my muck"... Laffin I know my house was a disaster and I apoligize. Didn't have time to do anything after 2 weeks in wyoming and a week later on the road to Denver... Let me know if you find out more.. Love you..

colonel angus said...

I wouldn't say you were that drunk.
Usually I have to carry over my shoulder. Really, a half pint?

Donna Piranha said...

The only alcohol abuse that occurred that night was not finishing my half of the beer I shared with Jenn.

As for the tape, I'm thinking it must have been my rehab counselor dad's message. I'm totally freaked out by it.
And I knew it was from 1978 because it said so on the outside.

Donna Piranha said...

Holy Fuck Madmax! That's not weird, it's fucking disturbing. I love the eyeball part though. Thanks for sharing.